5 Rules for Respect And Kindness(EXPERT)
© Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family and relationship coach
Do your kids think you have too many rules? Do they push the limits and boundaries of respect and tolerance for others?
Do they understand your value system and incorporate kindness in their daily lives, or just in front of you?
Perhaps you have had similar conversations that started like these in order to teach respect and kindness for others.
“What’s the matter with that word, they say it all the time on television?”
Clear Message of Respect
Though children and young adults will get mixed or conflicting messages from the television, magazine and friends, they need you to set and enforce clear, respectful rules and limits. They need to know that you expect them to do and be their best not just to please adults, but because it is the right thing to do.
Respect Is Real
You cannot fake respect for others. Kids have a built in BS radar. They are very aware of adult’s moods, attitudes and belief systems. If we want them to practice kindness and respect for others, you must show respect and kindness to them.
Children are natural imitators. Chances are very good they will associate with the same type of people you associate with. If you are bigoted, angry and mistrustful of others they probably will grow up to feel and do the same things. It is the responsibility of caring adults to teach by word and deed that most people are good, kind and valuable.
By providing this guidance you will help them learn how to be responsible, contributing members of society.
Consistent boundaries within the family are pretty predictable;
Consistency in discipline is the number one factor in successful families: It is important that love, respect, cooperation and expectations are unconditional and not dependent on circumstances or behavior.
Here are some common boundaries and rules of respect your family may have;
- The car will not start until the seat belt clicks. We obey the law.
- Parents must always know the 4 Ws before they are allowed to leave with friends. WHO are the friends, WHERE are they going, WHAT are they doing, and WHEN will they be home.
- We do not speak in derogatory ways about anyone. We accept others where they are in life, not where we want them to be.
- There is never just one way to solve a problem. Listen to other viewpoints and be willing to learn.
- Life always goes better when we follow the Golden Rule. Treat others as you would like to be treated.
Consistent boundaries and standards give a child and the whole family a feeling of security and safety. It is within this safe environment that self-discipline and life skills begin to flourish and develop.
Be Partners with Schools and Community Organizations
As a community, as well as a family, we need to give consistent messages to our children concerning dangerous, unacceptable and unkind behavior. When they understand hateful teasing or name calling is not acceptable it will be easier for them to forgo temptation to participate.
We live in a society that often encourages stress, anger and rude behavior. Be very careful that in the grip of daily life you do not pass on messages by your actions, attitudes or words that you would not like your child to follow.
It is our responsibility as adults to help them learn and live by the basic rule that actions have consequences. By teaching and enforcing family, school and community rules, you teach respect and tolerance for all.
Thank you for doing a good job
You are doing the most important job in the world, raising self-disciplined, thoughtful and contributing children. Thank you for your time and effort. We will all be blessed by having members of society who work within a framework of acceptable behavior.
This article was written just for you by Judy H. Wright, author and international speaker on parenting and family issues. Feel free to share with friends and associates, but please include this resource and contact box. For a full listing of books, articles, tele-classes and workshops go to http:// www.ArtichokePress.com You may also sign up there for FREE articles and Newsletters having to do with “finding the heart of the story in the journey of life” by clicking on http://www.AskAuntieArtichoke.com You will be glad you did and so will we.
Keywords: Boundaries, respect, kindness, children, parents, parenting, family, adults, consistent, rules, consequences, discipline, Judy H. Wright, Auntie, Artichoke Press,