Hello from beautiful Montana:

Tell your new friends about a great place to hike in Montana.
Tell your new friends about a great place to hike in Montana.

If you knew you were entering a room of strangers at work, church, meeting or even a store, what do you feel in your body?  Does your stomach muscles tighten, shoulders come up, hands get sweaty and the area in the back of your neck tighten up?  My body used to do all that plus get a rapid heartbeat I was sure the people on the next street could hear.

Yeah, there is help for shy, anxious and nervous people

Once I get to know and trust people I can relax and have fun. Sometimes that would take the whole party or activity.  Then gradually, I found shortcuts and tricks to help ease the anxiety and raise the confidence.

One of the first things I did was to watch how others made friends and influenced people (I also read the book and so should you).  It was amazing to see three tricks that were automatic for those who appeared comfortable and at ease;

  • They smile with their whole face. Their eyes light up when they see you.They lean slightly toward you in a body language signal that they are glad to connect.
  • They introduce themselves and put out their hand right to shake. they ask questions about you and then they listen to what you have to say. They don’t try to monopolize the conversation or interrupt what you are saying to make a point of their own.
  • Their posture is erect and their shoulders are back in an approachable position.  their hands are free to shake hands, hold a drink or gesture in the conversation.

Just these three little techniques can assist you in having more fun when you are with other people.  Building confidence is a skill and like every other skill, it takes time, effort and consistent practice in order to have it become automatic action.

There is plenty of help for shy, anxious and nervous people and I suggest you check out http://www.useencouragingwords.com You will be glad you did.


Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and motivational speaker

Help for Shy, Anxious and Nervous People