Teach Acceptance-Build Confidence
©JudyHWright http://www.judyhwright.com
We all have weaknesses that are hard to accept. Parents, teachers and caring adults see areas that need improvement in children and want to help them build confidence. The trick is to build confidence and acceptance without criticism and breaking the spirit.
As I have mentioned in previous articles and books, “Soar with Your Strengths.”
Determine which strengths are improvable, get to work on those and manage the rest. For instance if your child is not good in math, but excels in woodshop, then do everything possible to encourage him in working with wood. Find a tutor (high school or college student) to assist him in learning math in a way that makes sense for him.
The best way to build confidence and self-esteem is to find things we are good at and enjoy and do more of them.
Here Are Even More Ideas to Build Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem in Kids
Accept Imperfections — in Your Child and Yourself. Rules and high expectations can seem overwhelming to a child, who may not understand that you don’t expect her to be perfect.
One way to reassure her that it’s okay to make mistakes is to let her see you make them—and correct them or apologize. To do so will model for your child that it is fine to be human and that mistakes are temporary teaching tools. As we teach and model that mistakes are a part of live and that we can do better next time, it will be comforting and not an excuse to blame others.
Use Punishment Sparingly. In my work as a parent educator, I have seen parents come down hard on a child for a minor misdeed or oversight.
Major punishment for minor misdeeds makes kids feel helpless; the result is more likely to be a power struggle between parent and child than in a lesson in how life should be lived.
Shame and guilt create confusion and self-doubt. They are difficult and destructive emotions for all humans to overcome. If your method of discipline is shame, blame or guilt, please go to http://www.DisciplineYesPunishNo.com for many methods that are more effective and don’t break the spirit of the child.
Take or Make Time to Listen. Sometimes it feels impossible to find time to uninterrupted moments to listen to your child. It is essential for a child to get the opportunity to talk to each parent individually, especially in single-parent, blended or divorced families. Communicate regularly every single day.
If it is only five minutes before bed, let your child know that time is special and you will not lecture, blame or threaten, but just listen. Trust me on this one. You will never be sorry that you did not dismiss a confidence sharing time in order to lecture about dirty clothes on the floor.
Self-Awareness Quiz
- Do you accept that you will have areas of weakness and strength in your talents? Claim your eBook at http://www.UseEncouragingWords.com to help yourself and others be positive about life.
- Will you build self-confidence in yourself and your children by concentrating on the strengths and managing the weak areas?
- Will you take or make time to listen with your heart, ears and eyes when your child is sharing concerns?
About the Author
Judy Helm Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, the storytelling trainer is an author of over 20 books. She speaks internationally on topics of resilience, family relationships and empowerment. To contact her to speak for your conference or organization call 406-549-9813 or see http://www.judyhwright.com
