What does your Bad Body Image have to say to your kids?
The Accidental Messages You’re Sending
Imagine your child watching you get ready for work in the morning; “I am so fat, this outfit shows all my worst body parts. My thighs are huge, my butt is dragging, why can’t I be more self-disciplined?” This is all being said while you are eating a bagel with cream cheese and drinking a café latte.
In all my years as a parent educator, I have never met parents who (when they were In their right mind) wanted to hurt their child. Most parents sincerely want to encourage and empower their children to lead strong successful lives.
However, it is their un-mindfulness that defaults into old patterns and belief systems that teach their children accidently. Every moment is a teaching moment and kids believe what you share with them, either verbally or non-verbally. Here are 4 tips to make it easier to talk about bodies with our kids.
- Practice Positive Messages
If you truly care about the accidental messages you are sharing with your kids about body image, you will begin today to practice new ways to communicate self-worth. You may really need to be much more mindful of your language when anger, frustration or old patterns trigger old responses.
As a kind, thoughtful person who wants the best for your children, you will begin today to speak in nurturing ways that build, support and enhance.
The most significant way you can improve the self-image and confidence of your child as well as your inner child, is to become a fully functional and authentic person who is grateful for the body, talents and intelligence we have been given.
- Negative Self Talk
The negative messages and thoughts that operate like a well-oiled train running around and around in your brain were often planted in your youth. Perhaps it was your mom’s excessive worry about dieting and “looking good” or your dad’s jokes about people who were overweight.
Somehow you brought those preconceived attitudes and judgments into your adult life that how you look is more important than who you are.
It is not easy to stop the negative self-talk and self-abuse if you are not satisfied with your outer body, but it is possible. If you do not want to leave a legacy of complaining, comparing and self-criticism, then turn your negative attitude into a positive outlook in honor of the kids.
- Nurturing vs. Toxic Messages
One of the most significant ways to assist our children to love themselves and their bodies is for us to communicate in a positive way.
This means that your inner dialog and outward comments should be filled with encouragement and affirmations rather than put-downs and negative statements.
Nurturing communication says, both verbally and nonverbally: “I love and accept you. You are valuable and worthy.” That can be towards legs that may be a little heavy, but carry your body in a million different ways every day. This can be towards a child who says “my friend says I am ugly.”
- Stop Judging Yourself and Others
In order to assist your kids in developing strong, empowered body images, you and the other significant adults in their life, will need to set an example. This means putting a permanent stop to any belittling comment or judgment of your own body as well as others you come in contact with.
This new approach means that you will fill your mind and mouth with positive affirmations and encouragement rather than put-downs and negative statements.
- Use Encouraging WordsYou will want to claim your free downloadable eBook by signing up on the opt-in for www.AskAuntieArtichoke.com You will be glad you did.